Tomato Pie (Tart) with Not-Fried Green Heirloom Tomatoes & Spicy Remoulade (Vegetarian or Vegan)

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All Photos © Christine Elise McCarthy 2014

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vromans back

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OK.  This is fucking easy & light & can be vegan if you have a vegan dough recipe.  I used a Pillsbury pie crust which I just discovered has lard in it.  Oops!  I won’t make that mistake again.

Anyway – you can make your own pie crust with vegan butter or use a pre-made thing that is ACCIDENTALLY vegan – like Pillsbury Butter Flake Crescent Rolls.  Check out SO FAKE IT IS VEGAN or PETA’s ACCIDENTALLY VEGAN list for some surprising vegan items.

The fact is – if you are vegan but not on a gluten-free diet – you probably can figure out your pie crust pretty easily.  Gluten-avoiders probably have all their alternative options lined up, too, so I am not going to worry.  I am just gonna post this easy & yummy thing & let you guys work out subbing where you need to sub.

I really LOVE fried green tomatoes but good luck finding genuine green tomatoes in LA.  Yet – often when I squeeze the heirloom selection – the green ones are very hard.  Likely, they would be red ones if left on the vine long enough.  Who cares?  The hard green ones (and a resilient yellow one) worked great in this dish.  And, while it offers most of the pleasures of a fried green tomato recipe, it is not fried at all & comes with far less guilt.

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This spicy remoulade I made is basically spicy Thousand Island dressing.  Or – a tweak on the Delta Dipping Sauce I posted with my Spicy Baked Parmesan Zucchini Chips and my “Oh, shit!  I ate too big of a chunk of a pot truffle and now I need to cook my way out of an eighteen hour high” dinner (for THAT story – look here – and read the whole post) – Spicy Southern Fried Cauliflower and Delta Dipping Sauce with Smashed Baked Potatoes and White Gravy and Buffalo Mac & Cheese – seen below, respectively.



There are a bunch of ingredients but you just blend them up & go – so don’t be intimidated.



(PS – you can go ALL mayo rather than with yogurt – if the extra calories don’t concern you or if vegan yogurt is hard to find.)

1/2 cup yogurt – or vegan alternative

1/4 cup mayo – or vegan alternative

1/8 cup grain or Dijon mustard

1-3 garlic cloves

1 tsp dill pickle juice

1 cocktail dill pickle

1 tsp capers

1/2 tsp prepared horseradish

1/4 tsp cayenne pepper

1/4 tsp hot or smoked paprika

1 tsp hot sauce (I used Crystal)


Blend that shit up in a food processor or blender.  Refrigerate.

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Tomato Pie (Tart) with Not-Fried Green Heirloom Tomatoes


Pie crust for the tart shell (I used Pillsbury but I hear there is lard in them – so choose or make your crust with your own dietary restrictions in mind)

4 heirloom tomatoes (color selection not important) – mine were NOT ripe & were rock hard so look for this sort (or the hardest tomatoes you can find)  – sliced very thin

1 small sweet onion – sliced thin

2-4 garlic cloves – chopped


2 TBS butter – or vegan alternative

3/4 cup Panko or other bread crumbs

1/2 tsp onion powder

1/2 tsp garlic powder

1/2 tsp cayenne pepper

Basil or arugula or parsley as garnish (insanely optional)

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Heat the oven to 400 degrees.

I used a spring form tart pan like this one (photo stolen from Google):


ANY spring form pan or even a traditional pie dish will do – so don’t go buying something you don’t need.

Whatever pan you use – grease it up with cooking spray or olive oil or butter.

Slice the tomatoes & lay them on paper towels.  Sprinkle with salt & press more paper towels on top.  This will remove lots of their moisture so your tart is not soggy.

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Press your crust dough into whatever pan you are using and cut some vent slits in the bottom & bake empty (par-bake) for SEVEN MINUTES.  Take it out of the oven & set aside.

After the tomatoes drain for 15 minutes or more – layer the sliced onions & garlic & tomatoes into your crust.  Add lots of S&P.

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Melt the butter in a pan and add the panko & seasonings.  Spread it on top of the tomatoes.

Wrap tightly in foil (don’t forget the foil or your panko will burn) and bake for about 45 minutes to an hour – erring on the longer oven-time if you want really soft tomatoes.  Remove the foil & bake another five minutes or until the panko turns golden.

Let this sucker rest unmolested for at least 15 minutes before cutting into it.

Serve with the spicy remoulade & any garnish you feel inspired to use.  Bust out some champagne.  It’s the holidays!   Draw a hot bubble bath & polish off the champagne in the tub – with a copy of my book!!  Makes a great stocking stuffer – assuming the recipients of your stuffed stockings like to read raunchy comedies about drinking too much & regrettable sex.


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