Creamy Goat Cheese Spaghetti with Lemon & Collard Greens

All Photos © Christine Elise McCarthy 2013

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Yesterday, I decided to blog about wraps.  A wrap rap.  So – I set about making a wrap.  A collard green wrap.  But what to wrap it around?  I had the ingredients for a decent slaw in my fridge, leftover from my Vegan Pozole & Taco Pizza efforts so I decided to make a sort of light, Asian slaw with a soy-vinaigrette rather than anything creamy.  I also had some plain tempeh in my fridge so I opened that and marinated it in the soy vinaigrette.

Then, with the addition of some avocado & tomato – I commenced to wrap.

As seems to be happening more often these days, I was uninspired in the photography department.  I have exhausted my lit locations & various plates & napkins – all of which have been used many times & I now feel like all my images look the same.  Cranky & hungry – I snapped a few of the damn collard wrap & then shoved it in my face like a wine cork.

I discovered that 1) the vinaigrette was a bit overpowering and 2) the wrap was MESSY to eat and 3) I fucking hate tempeh!  Ick!  Even my dog Dexter turned it down when I offered it to him – though my fatboy Memphis ate the piece I gave him AND Dexter’s.

So – I found myself with nearly a full bunch of collard greens that had been quick wilted by soaking them for 2 minutes in boiling water.  I didn’t want to muck around with wraps anymore when it came time for dinner.  So – like usual – a meal was born of the other ingredients I had handy: lemon, goat cheese, parsley & pasta.  Oh – and some dried up old Parmesan.

This is the easiest kind of dish & comes together really fast.  The ratio of lemon or goat cheese I list here is just a suggestion.  You might like less lemon & more cheese or visa versa.  Feel free to tweak it to suit you.  Also – the collard green could be replaced with any other leafy green – Swiss chard or spinach or even asparagus or something.  This is a really healthy dish, too, as pastas go – so try it!

Creamy Goat Cheese Spaghetti with Lemon & Collard Greens

INGREDIENTS (for 2 servings)

8 oz pasta or your choice

5 oz goat cheese

1 bunch collard (or other) greens

Juice of 1 lemon

Lots of chopped parsley

S&P

Parmesan as garnish

DIRECTIONS

Boil water in the pot you will cook the pasta in.  Remove the ribs from the collard greens as is depicted above.   Roll the leaves & slice them.

My greens had already gotten a 2 minute soak but that isn’t necessary.  The collard greens will need about 5-7 minutes in the boiling pasta water.  My whole wheat spaghetti had a 7 minute cooking time so – had I not pre-soaked the greens for my failed wrap endeavor – I would have put them in the water with the spaghetti at the same time.   The greens are forgiving so do not sweat the timing.  Just drop them into the water with the pasta when your pasta is about 7 minutes from being done.

While the pasta cooks, scoop maybe 1/4 cup of the pasta water out & heat it in another pan.  Melt the goat cheese in that until it is nice & creamy.  I used an herbed goat cheese – hence all the flecks in it.  Add the parsley & lemon juice.

When the pasta is al dente, drain it & toss with the goat cheese.  Add S&P to taste.  Serve with additional lemon and/or parsley and/or Parmesan & plenty of fresh cracked pepper.

Not Just For Breakfast Pizza with Kale, Hominy & Egg

All Photos © Christine Elise McCarthy 2013

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I apologize up front for the sub par photography here.  I assume that the bulk of the better food bloggers make dishes specifically for their blogs and spend some time lighting the food beautifully & taking their time to get it right.  That isn’t what I do.  I do not have the luxury of making food solely for this blog.  The vast majority of what I post here are my actual meals.  I make myself dinner, I try to photograph it really quickly before it gets cold and then I eat it.  Sometimes this works beautifully.  Other times, like last night, the dish doesn’t lend itself to sitting out for long & retaining anything resembling a pleasing aesthetic  and some things – like runny yolks – are just plain gross to eat cold.  So – I post this dish because it was delicious but, again, I apologize for the less than perfect imagery.

Also frustrating are my ongoing efforts & repeated failures in trying to get a gorgeous photo of food with gooey yolk.  Some people out there really have this down.  I do not.   But I will keep trying!

Not Just For Breakfast Pizza with Kale, Hominy & Egg

INGREDIENTS

Pizza dough – mine is HERE

1 bunch kale

1 onion – diced

6 garlic cloves (or to taste) – chopped

Grated cheese of your choice

olive oil

Hominy – about 1/4 cup or so

1 TBS crushed red pepper

1 (or more) egg

DIRECTIONS

Heat your oven to 450-500 degrees.

Remove the ribs from the kale & throw them away & chop up the leaves.

Heat about 1 TBS olive oil on a saute pan.  Saute the onion & crushed red pepper a minute or two.  Then add the garlic & kale.  Saute about 5 minutes or until the kale is wilted.

Roll out the dough.  Place it on a greased pizza pan.  Top with the kale & the hominy & grated cheese.  Bake for about 10 minutes or until it looks just about done.

In the last two minutes – crack an egg in the center (or several – if you like) and bake a minute or two or until the egg whites look about cooked through.  You can err on the side of under-cooking the egg because it will continue to cook when the pizza is being cut up.  Fresh cracked pepper might be a nice finish!  Slice it up & chow down!

Taco Pizza with Hominy & Greens & Cilantro-Lime Vinaigrette

All Photos © Christine Elise McCarthy 2013

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Hominy.  I cannot escape it.  I bought this 7 pound can for $2.29 (for my Vegan Pozole)and I cannot seem to use it all up.

I also had leftover pinto beans from that same Pozole effort – and from those I made my “Not Your Mama’s” Spicy Vegan Refried Beans.  Now I am going to make a pizza using both the refried beans and the hominy – a Taco Pizza with Hominy & Greens & Cilantro-Lime Vinaigrette.  This is really just a suggestion – not a recipe.  You can add things you might prefer in your taco (cooked meat, for example) or lose things you dislike – perhaps the hominy.  The real key is the spread of the spicy refried beans rather than a tomato sauce.  And I never tire of cold salads on top of hot pizzas – so I recommend very highly that you try it.  The sweet dressing is a nice contrast to the spicy beans.

Oh – and here is a video that I am posting for no reason other than it pleases me.  I am also pleased that you have to be 18 to watch goofy guys flip their junk around in Speedos (as per Youtube rules).  Ah, the simple pleasures in life!

I also love this cover from Christian Porter on The Voice.

Taco Pizza with Hominy & Greens & Cilantro-Lime Vinaigrette

INGREDIENTS

Pizza dough – mine is HERE

Refried beans – mine are HERE

Grated cheese – any blend you like

Hominy – in the quantity of your preference

Red cabbage – shredded

Roasted or raw jalapeno – chopped

Tomato – diced

Cilantro – chopped

Mixed greens

Cilantro & Lime Vinaigrette

DIRECTIONS

Heat your over to 450-500.

Roll out the dough.  Room temperature dough is easier to work with.

Top the dough with some spicy refried beans, then layer jalapeno, hominy, tomato, red cabbage & cheese.   Bake for 1-12 minutes or until the cheese is melted & the crust is crispy.

Meanwhile – toss lots of greens in a little vinaigrette.  When the pizza is done, top it with the salad & maybe some more diced tomato & chopped cilantro.  Then – shove it ALL in your pie-hole.  I did.

Cilantro & Lime Vinaigrette Salad Dressing

All Photos © Christine Elise McCarthy 2013

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EASY!  Just stick everything in a blender.  Result?  A light & fresh dressing with a little sweet & a little tart & a little kick.  Yum!

Cilantro & Lime Vinaigrette 

INGREDIENTS

1/2 cup olive oil

1/4 cup fresh squeezed lime juice

1 TBS Dijon mustard

2 cloves garlic

1 jalapeno – seeded

2 tsp Balsamic vinegar

1-2 TBS honey – depending on how sweet you like it

1 bunch cilantro

S&P to taste

DIRECTIONS

Blend smooth in a blender or food processor.  Adjust flavors & lick your fingers.

Not Your Mama’s Spicy Vegan Refried Beans

All Photos © Christine Elise McCarthy 2013

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I had extra pre-soaked pinto beans from my Vegan Pozole recipe.  I was considering throwing them away & then a wave of shame hit me.  Wasting food is such a sin so I looked about my kitchen for inspiration & came up with the idea to make a clean & healthy refried bean recipe.  Refried beans.  The name sounds loaded with calories.  But here is what they say on Wikipedia about the name:

The name is based on a mistranslation: in Mexican Spanish, the prefix re is an informal form of emphasis meaning “very” or “well”, which has been confused with the English re, which more often indicates repetition. Thus, frijoles refritos really means “well-fried beans”, not “refried beans”. In this dish, the beans are often fried, but may also be baked, thus making the term “refried” a misnomer on two counts.

So – do not be afraid of this dish.  It only uses a little olive oil & these beans are so fresh tasting & bursting with flavors – you will never look the same way at those lard-laden, baby food bland refried beans they serve in Mexican chain restaurants.

Look how pretty they are with the green flecks of cilantro & the red of the smoked paprika!  So give these bad boys a try next time you have a Mexican themed meal!

UPDATE – heat these up with a lot of grated cheese & serve it up as a dip!!!

Not Your Mama’s Spicy Vegan Refried Beans

INGREDIENTS

4 cups cooked pinto beans (or 3 15 oz cans)

1-2 cups of stock

3 garlic cloves – chopped

1 jalapeno – seeded & chopped

1/4 cup cilantro

1 small onion – diced

1-3 chipotle peppers in their adobo sauce (I used 3)

1 tsp ground cumin

2 tsp ground coriander

1 tsp smoked paprika

olive oil

S&P to taste

Extra cilantro, chopped jalapeno & smoked paprika as garnish

DIRECTIONS

Cook your beans.  It is best they soak overnight or that you quick-soak them.

To soak beans overnight, rinse the dried beans and pick out any stones. Place the beans in a large bowl or saucepan and cover with water. Leave overnight.

The quick-soak method is terrific when you don’t have time to let the beans soak overnight. Put the beans in a large pot and add enough cold water to cover by three inches. Do not cover. Bring the water to a simmer over medium-high heat. Continue simmering for 2 minutes. Remove from heat. Cover and let stand for 1 hour. Drain.

If you are substituting canned beans for dried, 1 cup of dried beans produces 3 cups of cooked beans. 1 can contains 1/2 cups of drained beans.

When the beans are cooked (or when your caned beans are drained & rinsed) – take a 1/2 cup or so & set aside.  Put the rest of them in the bowl of a food processor or blender.  Adding as much stock as needed, puree the beans.

Add the chipotle and the dry spices & blend.  Add the cilantro & blend.

In a large frying pan – heat about 1 TBS of olive oil & cook the onions & jalapeno until the onions are translucent – or soft.  Add the garlic & saute two more minutes.  Add to the blender or food processor & puree the onions etc into the beans.  Leave the pan on the stove – as you will need it again in a minute.  Add stock as needed to puree the beans.  Do not be afraid you need more water to blend them than seems right.   Once they are completely smooth – put the bean puree in the frying pan and “fry” them in the residual oil until they thicken to the texture you like.  Add the reserved whole beans & stir them in.  Add S&P to taste.

Once the beans have reached the texture you like – serve them up.  I grated a little cheese on mine.  You could go heavier & use a pepper jack or cheddar – or lose the cheese entirely.  Your call.  Garnish with cilantro and/or jalapeno & some more smoked paprika.  Crack open a cold one!  Ole!

Jamaican Jerk Shrimp Pizza with Candied Jalapenos & Spicy Peach, Pineapple & Mango Salsa

All Photos © Christine Elise McCarthy 2013

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Oh no!  Guess what!  Another recipe born of leftovers & other remnants in my fridge.  This one commits the crime of combining seafood with cheese but, sometimes, you just gotta cook like an outlaw.

This recipe used my Spicy Peach, Pineapple & Mango Salsa

and my Candied Jalapenos

and my recent Marinara Sauce recipe

I also used this Jamaican Spice Paste (which is VERY tasty & has quite a kick!)

If you cannot find that kind, do not worry!  I guess Lowry’s makes a Jerk sauce & I am sure there are many other pre-made options out there.

I also used this BBQ sauce.  You can use your own favorite.

I made this pizza with some pre-cooked frozen shrimp (of which I am not a fan – but someone else bought them & left them here).  Grilling shrimp that has already been cooked & then baking it, too?  I think you can guess that my shrimp were quite dried out by the end & I think that is evident in the photos.  In fact – I found myself picking them off the pizza as I ate it.  But that was only because they’d had the bejeesus cooked out of them & they were poor quality shrimp to start with.  If you start with better quality raw shrimp – you will not have this problem.

Jamaican Jerk Shrimp Pizza

INGREDIENTS

Candied jalapenos

Spicy Peach, Pineapple & Mango Salsa

Pizza dough – mine is HERE or use you own favorite

1/4 cup marinara – mine is HERE or use your own favorite

1 tsp BBQ sauce

1/2 cup plus 1 TBS jerk sauce of your choice

12 or so good quality shrimp

Grated pizza cheese (quantity to suit your taste)

Cilantro

DIRECTIONS

Heat your oven to 450-500

Marinate your shrimp in 1/2 cup jerk sauce for at least an hour – or more.

Grill your shrimp – or pan fry them in a little olive oil.

Blend the marinara, bbq sauce & 1 TBS jerk sauce in a bowl.

Roll out your dough & place it on a cooking sheet sprayed with cooking spray or wiped with olive oil.

Spread the marinara blend over the crust & then top with the cheese & the shrimp.

Be SURE your oven has reached at least 450 before putting the pizza in.  A hot oven is critical for a crispy crust.  Bake the pizza for about 10 minutes or until the cheese is melted & crust is browning.  Top with the jalapenos & salsa & chopped cilantro.  Listen to Bob Marley & eat the whole fucking thing yourself.  I did!

Cheesy Spinach & Mushroom Lasagna Rolls with Feta & Homemade Ricotta Smothered in Marinara Sauce

All Photos © Christine Elise McCarthy 2013

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I was inspired to make these because I had a shit-ton of fresh spinach that was about to go bad.   Once I was well into the process here – I got the spinach out to steam it & realized some of it had already wilted to the point that I didn’t want to use it but I was able to save enough that I could still pull this recipe off.  I added mushrooms to the filling to make up for the lost spinach.  I also used some leftover feta because the homemade ricotta quantity was smaller than I felt this dish needed.

This is not a difficult dish to pull off.  In fact, I’d call it easy – if you used a jarred sauce & a store-bought ricotta.  I have no life & my boyfriend lives in Arkansas – so I have nothing but time.  So – I made the ricotta from scratch (which takes about 10 minutes – I swear) and I made the marinara (also pretty easy).  I used fresh spinach – not frozen – but frozen would work, too.  I would like to have added some sliced, fresh Buffalo mozzarella to the top at the end of the baking process but, alas, all I had was this ghetto pizza cheese.

It seemed a bit of a crime to bother to make the ricotta & then top these guys with processed cheese food.  Especially as I had sprung $14 (yes – FOURTEEN DOLLARS!!!) on these two cans of San Marzano tomatoes.  WTF?  But, shit happens so I just went with it.

As an aside – I have recently discovered the joy of buying whole peeled tomatoes & squishing them by hand.  I cannot explain why I find it so satisfying – but I do.  Maybe I feel more Italian?  Maybe I get out some buried aggression?  I don’t know – but I suggest trying it – even though I felt I had to finish this sauce by punishing it with an immersion blender – to break up the bits I’d missed.

But let me promise you – these lasagna rolls are delicious!  You could really roll anything up in lasagna noodles – a meat sauce or – you know – anything you would put in a traditional lasagna.  Try them.  You won’t regret it.

Spinach & Mushroom Lasagna Rolls with Feta & Homemade Ricotta Smothered in Marinara Sauce

INGREDIENTS

For the ricotta

1/2 gallon milk

2 cups buttermilk

1 tsp salt

2.5 TBS white vinegar

(or just use about 1 1/2 cups or so of store-bought ricotta)

For the Marinara

2 28 oz cans or tomatoes (crushed – or you crush them by hand)

1 small onion – diced finely

6 cloves garlic – minced

Olive oil

1 packed cup fresh basil – chopped

1/2 cup fresh parsley – chopped

1/4 cup fresh oregano – chopped

1 tsp dry oregano

2 tsp salt

1 tsp pepper

1 TBS good quality balsamic vinegar

For the lasagna rolls

12 (or so) lasagna noodles (more if you fear tearing some)

1 egg

12-16 oz spinach

1/2 cup Parmesan cheese – grated

1 cup feta cheese – crumbled

1 small onion – diced

1/2 lb mushrooms – sliced

4 cloves garlic

1 TBS crushed red pepper

S&P to taste

Extra Parmesan & basil or parsley as garnish

DIRECTIONS

For the ricotta

Heat the milk & the buttermilk in a pan.  When it just begins to bubble in the corners – turn off the heat.  Add the salt & the vinegar & stir.  With a slotted spoon – scoop out the curds that form until all that is left is the yellowish whey.  Alternatively – CAREFULLY pour the curdling milk through a cheesecloth-lined colander.  In either case – let it cool a bit & then wrap it up in cheesecloth and squeeze out as much moisture as you can.  Unwrap the ricotta from the cheesecloth & put in a bowl & set aside (or chill).  There is video of this process in my Lasagna Cupcakes post.

For the marinara

Heat about 1 TBS olive oil in a large stock pot.  Saute the onion until it is soft.

Add the chopped herbs, dry oregano & minced garlic & saute another minute or two – or until the spices become aromatic.  Add the two cans of tomatoes & the S&P.  Simmer a few minutes (or more).  Add the balsamic & stir to get it fully incorporated.  Allow to simmer on a very low flame until you are ready to assemble the rolls.

For the lasagna rolls

Heat your oven to 350.

Cook at least 12 lasagna noodles (I cooked the whole box & threw away the extra) until just al dente.  Rinse in cool water & set out to dry.

Bring some water to a boil.  Submerge the spinach until it just wilts.  Drain & run under cold water.  Squeeze out all the moisture & chop the spinach finely.

Heat 2 TBS olive oil in a large frying pan.  Add the chopped onion & the sliced mushrooms. I used  a red onion – which is why these images look kind of pink.

When the mushrooms are just about done to your liking – add the garlic & saute another minute or two.  In a bowl – mix the mushrooms, egg, ricotta, feta, Parmesan, crushed red pepper, spinach and some S&P.

Spread a bit of the mix on a lasagna noodle.  Roll it VERY loosely – applying no pressure – so that the filling doesn’t squeeze out.

Put a thin layer of marinara on the bottom of a baking pan.  Then place your lasagna rolls on that – SEAM SIDE DOWN.  You might need two pans to fit all your rolls in.

Top with some sauce & a bit of additional cheese.  If you are using buffalo mozzarella – add that about 10-15 minutes before the rolls are done cooking.

Wrap tightly in foil & bake for about 40 minutes.  Serve with more sauce, additional grated Parmesan & some fresh herbs.  Yum!

Vegan Puree of Celery Root Soup with Jalapeno & Caramelized Balsamic Pears

All Photos © Christine Elise McCarthy 2013

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This is a VERY easy soup to make.  The caramelized balsamic pears REALLY make it, too, so do not skip them.  They come together very fast & will impress your neighbors immensely.

I drizzled a little olive oil on this soup – which isn’t necessary but it looks pretty & gave me a chance to try my Rosemary & Crushed Red Pepper Infused Olive Oil.

I must say, the oil has been brewing since June 6th & is still only VERY subtly infused.  Maybe I should muddle the herbs & spices a bit?  I don’t know.  I will experiment.

But this soup!  Healthy & delicious!  This makes quite a lot of soup so be prepared for leftovers. These sorts of soups age well in the fridge over a day or two – but they often need a bit of water added in the reheating, sometimes quite a lot.  So – don’t be afraid to add as much water as you need to get it to your desired consistency.

Vegan Puree of Celery Root Soup with Jalapeno & Caramelized Balsamic Pears

INGREDIENTS

1 TBS + 1 tsp olive oil

1 small onion – chopped

4 celery stalks – chopped & then divided into two portions

1 leek – sliced (white part only)

2 garlic cloves – chopped

3 celery root (about baseball size) – peeled WELL (get all that rough brown & hair off!) & diced

2 medium potatoes – cubed

2 jalapenos – seeded & chopped

4 Bosc pears – peeled & seeded

7 cups vegetable stock

S&P to taste

4 TBS honey

2-4 large rosemary sprigs (more for garnish – if you like)

2 TBS quality balsamic vinegar

DIRECTIONS

Heat the honey in a saute pan over med-high heat.  When bubbly, add TWO (reserving the other two) of the pears & the rosemary sprigs to the honey and, stirring constantly, cook until the honey is almost cooked off & the pears are soft & beginning to brown.

Add the balsamic & cook for another minute or two – being very careful not to burn the glaze.   Carefully (that glaze will burn you!) transfer to a bowl & set aside.  Soak your pan immediately.  That honey-balsamic glaze is HOT & will become like cement fast.

If you like a 100% pureed soup – skip this step.  I like a little bit of something in there to chew.  Heat 1 tsp olive oil & saute HALF the sliced celery stalks to the oil & saute until soft – without browning.  Maybe 2-3 minutes.  Drain on paper towels & set aside.

Be sure you have removed all the brown & coarse, hairy bits from the celery root.  Otherwise, you will be spitting what feels like hairballs into your napkin later.  Not fun.  Or pretty.

Heat the olive oil in a large stock pot over medium heat.  Add the jalapenos, onion, the remaining half of the sliced celery (or ALL of it – if you are skipping the step above) & the leek.  Saute until soft but not browned.  Add the garlic for a few seconds then add the potato, celery root, the remaining two pears & all the stock.  Bring to a rapid boil then reduce heat & simmer about twenty-thirty minutes or until everything is very tender.

When the vegetables are tender either use a blender (immersion or otherwise) or a food processor to puree the soup until it is very smooth.  Add more water if it is too thick for your taste.  If you sauteed the 2 celery stalks, add those to the puree now.  Add S&P to taste.

When ready to serve, discard the rosemary from the pears, heat the puree & then pour some into bowls & top with about 1 TBS of the caramelized balsamic pears & maybe a sprig of fresh rosemary.   Drizzle with olive oil (infused, if you have it) & add some fresh cracked pepper & go to town!

Road Kill Roasted Cauliflower & Hominy Tacos with Homemade Corn Tortillas & Spicy Peach, Pineapple & Mango Salsa

All Photos © Christine Elise McCarthy 2013

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Roadkill?  Caught your attention, didn’t it?  Silly!  I don’t eat meat.  But I did buy some Dean Jacobs Road Kill Grill Rub because of the promise that it “Makes all critters taste great.”

I bought it in Gilroy (the garlic capital of the world) for my boyfriend, Miles, who lives almost as exclusively on meat as zombies do on brains.  Whenever I think of zombies, and these days – what with their resurgent popularity – I think of them quite often – I think of my favorite zombie chant.  (I stole the image below from Google.)

The monomaniacal nature of zombies can sometimes be quite endearing.

At any rate – I bought the Road Kill rub in Gilroy on a road trip that led to my vagina-centric post about Elsy’s Antojitos & my Shrimp & Cheesy Grits post which got into my pug, Memphis, and his tooth removal & the drunken, loopy slob he returned home as – still wobbly from getting put under.  Look how drunk he looks in the pose he struck!  🙂

That was last September (when I bought the Road Kill Grill) & Miles has never used it so I decided to bust that shit out.  It has a very smokey salty flavor & it worked AWESOMELY for this dish but, if you cannot find it, any taco seasoning or other grill rub would likely work.  Even a homemade blend of spices would work – and you can Google a zillion options for that.

The recipe for the corn tortillas is HERE.

The recipe for the Spicy Peach & Pineapple & Mango Salsa is HERE.

You can use pre-made corn tortillas and any kind of salsa you like.  The real magic here is the roasted cauliflower & hominy filling.  I have been long obsessed with each of those ingredients & the threesome we had last night was – well – worth repeating.  Much like my Vegan Pozole, and any taco recipe, the toppings are up to you.  Here are a few ideas:

IDEAS for the toppings –

Grilled or fresh corn cut from the cob

Chopped tomatoes

Chopped cilantro

Sliced avocado

Sliced radishes

Lime wedges

Chopped cabbage (red or green)

Red onion – diced

Lettuce – chopped

Feta or Cotija (or other) cheese

Sour cream or yogurt or Mexican Crema

The only thing you need from me here is the recipe for the roasted cauliflower & hominy – so let’s get to it!  I found myself devouring it right off the roasting pan.  Try to use a high quality spice mix – and not something that has been in your pantry for 6 years & requires a fork to break it up.  OK?  I can’t take responsibility for your old, ashy spices!  🙂

Roadkill Roasted Cauliflower & Hominy

1 head cauliflower – broken into the tiniest florets

2 cups hominy

3 tsp Road Kill Grill rub (or rub/spices of your choice)

olive oil

S&P

DIRECTIONS

Heat your oven to 425.

Place your tiny cauliflower florets on a greased cooking sheet.  Drizzle with a little olive oil & toss TWO (reserving one) of the tsps of spice rub in.  I tossed this with my hands to get a good even mix.

Roast for 15 minutes.  In the meantime – toss the other tsp of spice with the hominy with a teensy bit of olive oil (not more than a teaspoon).

When the cauliflower is done, add the hominy to the pan & roast all of it another 15 minutes.

Take out of the oven.  Try not to just stand there & eat that shit.

Now – you simply have to assemble your tacos!

Authentic Homemade Corn Tortillas

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Ok – again – this is not really a recipe. It is inspiration for you to try something that you might not have ever even considered.  Corn tortillas!  I have posted spinach tortillas & kale tortillas in the past.  Those were both flour tortillas – and they have their place.  But I really love corn tortillas, too, and I love tacos – so – I thought I’d give it a go!

There is no real recipe.  You simply go buy some masa harina.  It is ground hominy – or a product of corn & lime.  It is ground very fine.  You then make the dough according to the measurements on the bag.  Mine suggested 2 cups flour to 1 1/3 cups water.  Period.  The dough comes together in a bowl instantly.  You are, I discovered, meant to let the dough rest for 30 minutes or more before working with it but I was impatient.

I happen to have invested about $10 in a tortilla press.  Totally unnecessary!  Not because it isn’t easy to use – it is.  But – because just getting a glass pie dish out or the bottom of a large pan – anything with a large, flat surface that can be used to apply pressure will work.  The dough is very soft & flattens far more easily than a flour dough would.  It also tears for more easily – so do not beat yourself up if it takes a bit to get the hang of these.  Know that these tortillas have a softer, breadier texture than the more coarse & grainy store-bought ones.

Definitely put either wax or parchment paper on either side of your dough – or use plastic wrap.  Others SWEAR by cutting a ziplock freezer bag in two & using two sheets of that.  Apparently – it is the least sticky option.  If your dough is REALLY sticky – try adding more masa.

So – basically – you make little balls somewhere between the size of a golf ball & a pool ball.  Press it flat in between two pieces of some sort of wrap.  Then, peel it off one side, flip the bare side onto your palm & carefully peel off the other side.  I tore a lot of them & just balled them up & pressed them again.Heat a dry pan to very high heat then reduce it just a bit so the pan doesn’t smoke.  Carefully flop the tortilla into the pan.  Do not try to flip it until it moves around on the pan when you push it.  If it sticks still – let it cook more.  Once it slips around easily – flip it.  This should take between 30-60 seconds.  Do the same on the other side.  Then store in a tortilla warmer or wrap them in a kitchen towel until you are ready to eat them up.

Reheating?  From Epicurious:

There are several methods for reheating corn tortillas: dry heat (gas flame), moist heat (steamer and microwave) and oily heat (dry-frying).

Dry heat:
This method works only if your tortillas have been made that day. Heat the tortillas directly over the flame (or on a griddle or skillet), flipping them until toasty and pliable.

Moist heat of a steamer:
This is easier for larger quantities of corn tortillas, especially if you need to hold them hot for a little while. Pour 1/2 inch water into the bottom of the steamer, then line the steaming basket with a clean, heavy kitchen towel. Lay the tortillas in the basket in stacks of 12 (a small vegetable steamer will accommodate only one stack; a large Asian steamer will hold three or four stacks). Fold the edges of the towel over the tortillas to cover them, set the lid in place, bring the water to a boil and let boil only for 1 minute, then turn off the fire and let stand, covered, for 15 minutes. If you wish to keep the tortillas hot for up to an hour, slip the steamer into a low oven or reheat the water periodically.

Moist heat of a microwave:
This easy method works best with no more than a dozen tortillas. Drizzle a clean kitchen towel with 3 tablespoons water and wring the towel to even distribute the moisture. Use the towel to line a microwave-safe casserole dish (8 or 9 inches in diameter is best). Lay in a dozen tortillas, cover with the towel and the lid, then microwave at 50 percent power for 4 minutes. Let stand for 2 to 3 minutes. The tortillas will stay warm for 20 minutes.

Oily heat:
Though it’s not much a part of home cooking, street vendors of seared-meat tacos reheat fresh tortillas with the heat of a slightly oily griddle — they’re not so much frying the tortillas (which would mean completely submerging the tortillas in oil) as griddle-heating them with a tiny bit of oil.

When just-baked tortillas come off the griddle or when they’ve been reheated, they’re traditionally kept warm in a tightly woven basket (chiquihuite) lined with a cloth; some have lids, others don’t. In the Yucatan, they use hollowed-out gourds. And in modern households, they use Styrofoam containers — which are so efficient that they now come in many decorated styles. If you’re having a party, hold hot tortillas in an insulated chest (like an ice chest) lined with a towel.

Spicy Peach, Pineapple & Mango Salsa with Jalapeno

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I WROTE A BOOK!!!!!  Check it out!

 

This hardly counts as a recipe.  All you really do is chop everything up & toss it together.  You can lose any one (even two) of the fruits or the jalapeno (if you dislike heat) & there would be no significant change in the quality here.  This makes a lot – like – enough to put out for a party.  I like to eat a little every day on a fancified veggie dog.

It’s pretty delicious on pretty much anything – fish, shrimp, tacos, quesadillas, chicken – whatever – so don’t be shy with it.  I am going to post a new cauliflower concoction soon that I used this on.  So – look out for that!

Peach, Pineapple & Mango Salsa with Jalapeno

INGREDIENTS

1 cup fresh pineapple (or canned)

1 mango – peeled

1 peach – pitted

1 red bell pepper

1/2 red onion

3 jalapenos – seeded

1 cup cilantro

Juice of 1 lime

juice of 1 lemon

S&P to taste

DIRECTIONS

Chop up everything but the lemon & lime.  Toss everything with the juice of the lemon & the lime.  Add S&P to taste.  Rejoice!

Vegan Pozole with What Cha What Cha What Cha Want!

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I have never had any version of this soup but the one I made today.  I made it early in the day so that I could get it all documented & then, at dinner time, just relax & eat the soup in peace.   Fat chance!  I tasted it for salt & then stood over the pot on the stove in a feeding frenzy like a starving shark that suddenly found itself surrounded by chum.  It is so delicious – just naked out of the pot – without any toppings.  I was amazed!   The soup itself is very basic.  It is an Ancho chili puree with some hominy (for which I still lust) and pinto beans (optional).  Pozole is served kind of like a soup-bowl taco in that the bowl is the taco shell, the pozole is whatever meat (of fish or whatever) and then all that remains is the art of topping it with what cha want – from a selection of the same sorta things you would see on a taco bar.   I added feta because I had it but you could use Cotija or some other hard, salty cheese (or even cheddar) – and you vegans can just cut the cheese.  Cut the cheese!  You vegans – always cutting the cheese.  lol

And – I am officially an 8 year old.

I opened a can of hominy that weighs nearly 7 pounds – so brace yourself for more hominy recipes in the near future.  It only cost $2.29 – so I couldn’t resist!  It was cheaper than the small cans, for Chrissake.

I quick soaked some dry pinto beans.  Click that link for instructions.   You could do that or soak some beans overnight or use canned beans.  Soaked beans are apparently less good for your heart because soaked beans cannot claim “the more you eat the more you fart.”  The longer they soak – the less chance you have of getting Dutch-ovened by your fucker of a bed-mate later that night.  Don’t say I never did anything for you.

1 pound of dry beans soaked for a few hours produced about 4 cups of beans.  I only used 2 cups in this recipe.  Look at these silly beans.

I’ve pointed this out before but – just in case you are alarmed – SETTLE.  THESE beans are great for cooking.  It says so – right on the bag.  Crisis averted.  Moving on.

Look how PRETTY they are dry!

That all kinda fades away during the soaking so don’t get too attached.

I grilled fresh corn for one of my garnishes – but that is totally up to you.

And – predictably now, I used the produce I had around that needed using.  Another sad & wilted orange bell pepper.  You can use a fresh one – of any color!

I happen to grow fresh oregano (and sage & mint) because – despite going dormant outdoors over the winter – they all spring back in the spring.  Free fresh herbs!  Try it.  Just plant your mint in its own container because mint is like kudzu & will take over your entire home.  Still – you can buy fresh oregano – if I’ve just now given you notice to grow it far too late.

Anyway – this soup is DELICIOUS.  This recipe makes about 6 servings, I’d guess. especially if you use a lot of toppings.  You could add some cooked meat or fish if you wanted to – or some vegetarian/vegan option, too – but it is so not necessary!

Vegan Pozole with What Cha What Cha What Cha Want! 

INGREDIENTS

For the Soup

4 dry Ancho Chilies (or guajillo or some combo)

1 small onion

1 bell pepper

1 tomato

6 garlic cloves (or less)

3 TBS fresh oregano

1 cup reserved chili water (from soaking the Ancho chilies)

1 TBS olive oil

6 cups stock (I used vegetable)

2 TBS dry Mexican oregano

4 cups hominy

2 cups cooked pinto beans (optional)

juice of 2 limes

S&P to taste

IDEAS for the toppings – 

Grilled or fresh corn cut from the cob

Chopped tomatoes

Chopped cilantro

Sliced avocado

Sliced radishes

Lime wedges

Chopped cabbage (red or green)

Red onion – diced

Lettuce – chopped

Feta or Cotija (or other) cheese

Corn tortillas (chips)

Sour cream or yogurt or Mexican Crema

And – anything else you want or what cha want on your taco – get loco!

DIRECTIONS

Quick soak the beans – if you are using dry ones.

Boil a pot of water & turn off the heat.  Put a few small cuts in your dry Ancho chilies & submerge them in the boiled water.  Let soak 20 minutes.  Reserve 1 cup of the chili water & then drain the chilies.  Remove the hard stems & seeds.

Roughly chop the tomato, bell pepper & onion.

Add the onion, bell pepper, tomato, oregano, garlic, Ancho Chilies & the cup of reserved chili water to the bowl of your food processor (or blender) & blend into a smooth puree.  I did this in stages.  You needn’t.

In a soup pot, heat the dry oregano in the olive oil for about a minute.  Add the puree.

Cook this down over med-high heat for about ten minutes or until it gets thick & begins to darken a bit.

Add the hominy & pinto beans (if using) and the 6 cups of stock.  Bring to a boil & then reduce heat & allow it to simmer while you prepare your toppings – which means – as you chop everything up.

To serve – simply put the toppings you prepared in individual bowls on the table.  Ladle some soup into bowls.  Allow everyone to dress their pozole they way they like and you do What Cha What Cha What Cha Want!

Roasted Jalapeno & Goat Cheese Mac & Cheese with Candied Jalapenos

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OK – this is the best fucking mac & cheese I have ever made!  It was made out of crap I had in my fridge that I needed to use before it went bad.  Look how wrinkled & sad this orange pepper is:

I had leftover whole wheat penne (and I added some freshly cooked macaroni):

And some random cheese:

The only ingredient I had to go buy was soy milk.

So – armed with a selection of bits & pieces & a desire to TRY my new candied jalapenos – I invented this dish.  Candied jalapenos take about ten minutes and are a revelation!!!!   MAKE SOME!  This entire mac & cheese recipe?  A few steps, sure – but all easy.  And I promise you – the flavor of the cheeses & roasted jalapeno contrasted against the sweet, candied jalapenos is worth the price of admission.  This is THE BEST mac & cheese I have ever tasted.  Seriously.  This can be tweaked easily so do not give up if you hate goat cheese or don’t have a wrinkled, old, orange pepper.  Just improvise!

I apologize for the less than inspired photography – but I wanted to get my eat on & my drink on!  Can you blame me?

Roasted Jalapeno & Goat Cheese Mac & Cheese with Candied Jalapenos

INGREDIENTS

Candied jalapenos (recipe HERE) – they take 10 minutes so DO IT!

8 cups cooked pasta (1 1/2 lbs dry pasta??)

6 oz goat cheese

6 oz fresh mozzarella – sliced

2 cups grated cheddar (or other cheese) blend

1 bell pepper – diced

1/2 onion – diced

2 roasted jalapenos (or just raw – diced) – use more or less to suit your taste

2 scallions – chopped

olive oil

2 cups milk (or vegan alternative)

2 TBS butter

2 TBS flour

S&P to taste

DIRECTIONS

Heat the oven to 350.

Cook the pasta you are using according to package directions, drain & put in a large mixing bowl.

Char the outside of the jalapenos until they blacken.  You can do this directly on the burners or by broiling in the oven.  Once blackened, seal them in Tupperware or wrap them in foil for about 15 minutes.  This will sweat the skin off.  Then, under cool running water, roll the blackened skin away & squeeze off the tops & remove the seeds.  Then – chop the jalapenos finely.

Heat 1 TBS olive oil in a frying pan & saute the roasted (or raw) jalapenos, onions, scallions & bell pepper until soft – maybe 5 minutes.  Dump them onto your cooked pasta.

Melt the butter in a pan over med-high heat.  Whisk in the flour.  Whisk smooth.  When it gets thick (and that will be almost immediately) – add the milk slowly – allowing the mixture to thicken each time.

When you add the last of the milk – also add the goat cheese & the grated cheese blend.  Melt & dump onto the pasta & stir to combine completely.  And S&P to taste.

Pour this into a greased casserole pan.

Bake for 30 minutes.  Remove from the oven & add the sliced mozzarella & some candied jalapenos.

Bake another 10-15 minutes.  Remove from the oven & allow to rest 10-15 minutes.

Then – serve it with maybe some more roasted jalapenos or candied jalapenos – or both.

Then just shovel this into your face & be prepared to blame menopause for your impending girth.  Or a massive tumor.  Whatever.  Just eat this glorious stuff without caution or guilt.  Feel free to get drunk, too.  Who’s watching?

Candied Jalapenos

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I stole this recipe from one of my favorite food blogs – How Sweet It Is.  She put them on the most delicious-looking nachos ever!  Isn’t her photography gorgeous?  The complete recipe is HERE.  I am going to use them a different way – recipe soon to follow.

This photo only was taken from HOW SWEET IT IS.

Here is her recipe:

CANDIED JALAPENOS

Ingredients:

candied jalapeños
4 jalapeño peppers, stems removed and sliced into rounds
1/4 cup apple cider vinegar
2 tablespoons water
the juice of 1 lime
3/4 cups granulated sugar

Directions:

To prepare jalapeños, combine vinegar, water, lime juice and sugar in a small saucepan. Bring to a boil, whisking to dissolve the sugar then reduce to a simmer and cook until syrupy, about 3-4 minutes. Add the sliced peppers to the mixture, increasing the heat once more so it’s bubbling and cook for another 3-4 minutes, until peppers are wilting and no longer bright green. Remove the peppers with a slotted spoon and place in a refrigerater-safe jar or container.

Simmer the syrup for another 2-3 minutes, then pour it over top of the peppers. Store in the fridge. You can make these ahead of time and pull them from the fridge when ready.

Pasta with Roasted Beets & Goat Cheese

 

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This is super easy & really pretty delicious.  Not a lot of ingredients and, once you’ve roasted the beets, it comes together in the time it takes you to boil pasta.  Mine there is sitting on a bed of spinach but I don’t recommend putting spinach in this.  It is just there for aesthetics.

Pasta with Roasted Beets & Goat Cheese

INGREDIENTS

2 large beets (or several smaller ones) – I used red & golden varieties

3 garlic cloves

1/2 cup Parmesan – grated

5 oz goat cheese

Olive oil

S&P to taste

Mint or parsley or basil as garnish

DIRECTIONS

Toss the beets & garlic cloves in a little olive oil, wrap in foil & roast at 425 for 30-45 minutes – depending on their size – or until they are tender.  Let them cool & then peel them & cut them into chunks.  Reserve a handful of small cubes of beet for garnish later.

Boil your pasta.

In a food processor, puree the rest of the beets & Parmesan & roasted garlic & 1-2 ounces of the goat cheese & one cup of water until very smooth.  Add S&P to taste.

Put 1 TBS olive oil in a saute pan & heat the beet puree through.  Do not burn it!

Drain the pasta & add it & the beet puree to a bowl & mix until all your pasta is a deep magenta. Serve on plates with extra dollops of goat cheese, a few cubes of roasted beet, whatever herb you selected to garnish it with & some fresh cracked pepper!

Baked Risotto with Caramelized Fennel & Onion with Roasted Cauliflower, Brie & Walnuts

All Photos © Christine Elise McCarthy 2013

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OK!  So.  I posted a traditionally prepared risotto.  Now, I am posting the lazy man’s risotto.  Baked.  No stirring.  I had never tried this before.  To be honest – I found it a tad overcooked & mushy but (as I have already confessed) I am not a texture whore and (as I will confess now) I am a food whore and – if not an all around hedonist – I am certainly invested in consumption-based hedonism.  So this brie-laced mush had my name ALL OVER IT!

This recipe will present to you many opportunities.  I added my  googolplex of flavor-rich food accoutrements AFTER the risotto was cooked.  You could add the ones I did or really anything else you might like – other cheeses or other vegetables or herbs or even meats.  Just cook them separately & stir them in once the risotto is done.  SO EASY!

Baked Risotto with Caramelized Fennel & Onions with Roasted Cauliflower,  Brie & Walnuts

INGREDIENTS

1 cup Arborio rice

1/2 head cauliflower – broken into small florets

1 fennel bulb – sliced very thin (reserve the feathery tops to use as garnish)

1 small onion – sliced thin

10 garlic cloves

6 oz brie – cut into small cubes

1/2 cup walnuts – broken up

1 cup dry white wine

4 cups stock

olive oil

S&P

DIRECTIONS

Toss the cauliflower florets & 6 garlic cloves  in a little olive oil & roast at 45o for about 30 minutes or until the cauliflower begins to brown.

Toast the walnuts in a dry pan for about 3 minutes being careful not to burn them.   Set aside.

Heat 1-2 TBS olive oil in a saute pan.  Cut the remaining garlic cloves in half & saute them with the sliced fennel & onion over medium heat.  Stir frequently & saute this for 30-45 minutes or until the onions & fennel become a golden brown. Set aside.

Heat your oven to 350.  Grease a casserole dish & add the Arborio rice, the wine & the stock (or 5 cups stock – if you don’t want to use wine).  Bake – covered – for about 45 minutes.  It should still look sorta soupy.

Chop the garlic you roasted with the cauliflower & add it to the hot risotto.  Reserve a few cauliflower florets for garnish & just dump the rest along the brie, caramelized fennel & onions & stir until well blended.

Serve topped with a cauliflower floret, toasted walnuts & maybe some of the green tops to the fennel.  Eat with abandon & feel way fatter immediately.

 

Alternatively – this is delicious with a very healthy dosing of crushed red pepper!